Mr. Nee and I (Miss Dee) have been together for over two years and for quite some time we discussed the possibility of marriage. We both voiced our concerns, reservations and needs regarding this. Our biggest concern was that I was moving to Santa Barbara for nine months as required by my doctoral program. However, over much discussion, we decided that becoming engaged would be the next step in our relationship. We had not really discussed when was this going to happen but I felt it could happen while we were vacationing in NYC this past August. And, well, it did sort of happened in NYC. Let me explain.
Mr. Nee and I had just come from Astoria after dropping off our luggage at Mr. Nee's friends' house, when we arrived to the Met. Perhaps this is a NYC phenomenon but the tourists at the Met (as well as at the other NYC museums we visited) were particularly obnoxious. They would step right in front of me and take a picture of the painting. Every museum I have been to in LA definitely discourages this because 1) flash photography can lead to deterioration and 2) copyright issues. It is also just very annoying and inconsiderate to everyone else who is smart enough to know that better quality images of the art are sold in the gift store and available free online. In addition to the annoying adult tourists, there were children running all over the place who were encouraged by their parents to "pretend" to touch these famous works of art so that said parents could then take a picture. You get the idea that I was pretty cranky at this point.
After the Met, Mr. Nee suggested we go to the West Village. Not knowing NYC very well, I agreed, figuring there would be fun things to do. After walking for over an hour in what was the hottest week of the year (over 95 F) and not arriving at any set destination, I was needless to say, a bit cranky. Ok, I was really cranky and I took it out on Mr. Nee. After expressing my discomfort and frustration for about an hour, Mr. Nee finally said, "I thought we could look for a ring." I felt like a super jerk. I quickly apologized and we proceeded to walk around the West Village and other parts of NYC. The next day we did look at some shops but just did not find the one. Since we left NYC empty handed, we decided not to announce our engagement until we had found a ring.
The following week with my friend Miss A in tow, we searched for rings in La Jolla and Fashion Valley. I knew right away I did not want a traditional ring. Mr. Nee feels strongly about diamonds and their links to exploitation and violence. For me, diamonds can represent excess, greed and what has become known as the "bridal industrial complex." I also do not find them particularly aesthetically pleasing. However, I do respect those who have chosen diamonds for their engagement rings particularly if to them it represents everlasting friendship, respect and love. So, you can imagine the disgust I felt when one saleswoman pressured me into trying on a $10,000 ring. I made a spreadsheet to help me collect information and also brought along my digital camera to take pictures of the rings. Most jewelers were fine with this and the only place that would not allow this was a name brand jeweler in the mall (they wouldn't even allow me to write down any of the ring's information on my spreadsheet which I thought was really odd, maybe she thought we were jewelery spies or planning to rob the place). I did find some key contenders but not quite the one.
Two days later accompanied by Mr. Nee, we revisited some finalists in La Jolla. I showed Mr. Nee one ring I really liked at a shop called Mario Master Jeweler and Designer. Let me just say Mario and his daughter are awesome. Both are very friendly, helpful and honest. Mr. Nee did not like my selection, so Mario comes out of the back room with several vintage settings. I believe it may have been the first or second one I tried on that when I saw it, I knew it was the one. I know pretty cheesy but it just looked and felt right. Since Mr. Nee and I did not want a diamond, Mario's daughter suggested a sapphire. We must have looked through about 20 different blue sapphires in a variety of shades and levels of brilliance before deciding on one. After we decided, she said it would take a few days to mount and size. I thought Mr. Nee would propose the following weekend when we would both be in Santa Barbara together.
The next morning I was all set to move up to Santa Barbara when I made one final request of Mr. Nee: he get me a breakfast burrito from El Cuervo. As we were about to sit down for our breakfast burritos, I wanted to go to the bathroom to wash my hands. When I came back, there was a tiny little ring box on top of my hot sauce container. Mr. Nee then formally propose on one knee and of course I accepted.
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